I'm almost out...
I talked crap @ 3:29 p.m. on Wednesday, Apr. 07, 2004

I think I can count on one hand my family that really actually want to come to my graduation... and two of them can't even come. 1) Grandma Ruth *but she died in Jan.* 2) Grandma Bonnie. 3) the Heanues *but they can't get to cali till around june 18*.

And I think that's it. Granpa I don't think really likes me... he likes the Heanues more. Uncle Richards family doesn't really care for anyone but themselves. My tia+tio could prolly care less. My aunt Connie actually may, but I'm not so sure... My aunt Carolyn doesn't seem to really care either, but I think if she had a ride she'd come. My aunt Carlene may, but she may also get more 'depressed' again.

I mean I know that all of them are guna come... well hopefully at least. But it's sadening that the ones that I really want to be there with me, aren't going to be. Oh yeah btw, this is all besides my imedate family (mom dad justin). I know granma Ruth would've been so proud of me. Her 'sweet baby' (she'd always say that) tiff. Seeing me up there. I know she would have been. She would've been so proud that I would soon become a great photographer. I would take pictures of her. With her "highlighter" eyebrows. Hehe that was a lot of fun and a lot of memories i'll never forget, shannon.

the Heanues are my bestfriends. They had to move away to rhode island in oct. I love everyone of them. I love just being with them. Being blonde with shannon, haveing great talks with rachel, being a total goofball and just loving life with jenny. They get to come down for the summer, but they won't get to cali till June 18. I graduate on June 6. Oh well, i'm not pulling a pity party. It just makes me a little discouraged. It will still be a wonderful weekend. But sometimes it feels it won't be as special. Esp. without my granma there.

Here's a list of a few things that my granma Ruth never got to see or experience with me:

1) My graduation

2) My make-up train case she always gets her grand-daughters but forgot to w/ me.

3) Graduating from College

4) The scrapbook I'm making for my mom, w/ the help of my Granma Ruth

5) Me becoming the Photographer of my dreams

6) My wedding

7) Being the great grandma of my children

8) ... there's a lot more...

::sigh:: I don't know, I just am feeling a little discouraged. Not haveing a bestfriend to talk to about what's going on in my mind. Haveing to keep it all to myself. No one wants to hear a baby cry. But it's okay anyway, I'll get over it eventually.

<< | >>